Mike Moxcey ©2002

Abnormal Norman

by Mike Moxcey

April, 1981, New Hampshire.

Abnormal Norman escaped from the mental insti-
  tution every Saturday night.
Psychopathic Sue used to come with him, too
  to the disco with the stroboscopic light.

Norman didn't change his clothes or his brain
  and Susan was confusin' as could be.
But they weren't a sight, they weren't even quite
  just as weird as the dancers they'd see.

There were bald-headed women who pretended they were swimmin'
  or they'd dance like puppets on a string
or they'd slither like a snake or sometimes they'd rollerskate
  and flap their arms like they had wings.

Norman used to stare up at his image in the mirror
  and fall into a hypnotic trance.
His mind would start itching and his body'd start twitching
  and Abnormal Norman would dance.

And while he was droolin', Psycopathic Susan
  would start to scream and holler and yell.
and they would all let her which pleased her much better
  than a padded institutional cell.

It was so amusin' watching Norman and Susan
  that the semifinals they always won.
But they were getting spinals during Thursday night finals
  and the judges wondered what could be done.

So one night they cornered Abnormal Norman
  and asked him why such a good dancer
would get so uptight he wouldn't show Thursday night
and this was Norman's abnormal answer.

He said, "We don't like freaks and it takes us all week
  just to get our brains back to norm.
So that's why we leave on Saturday eve
  but always go back Sunday morn."

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